Unemployed Dater

I know I'm not the only one out there considering the state of the economy. I'm laid off. Unemployed. This is tricky when dating. I always mention it on the first date but usually not via online dating or email. I'm up front and honest about it. Hey, it's not like I'm not earning money. I receive unemployment. But there is a feeling of loser-ness.

I volunteer to take up the time. Job search of course. Some days it's difficult to stay motivated. The pressure from society and friends and family builds. And then dating enters the picture. Should I refrain from dating because I'm unemployed? Sometimes I think I should. And at the same time think I shouldn't. Somehow the guys I've dated have all had jobs, which under normal economic circumstances would be a must. And under the unemployment circumstance I think I should seek co-unemployed men. Some tease about my situation. No one has outright said they were turned off but I think even the "innocent" teasing is a poke or prod at letting me know they're not exactly "ok" with the fact.

It seems like everything compounds the issue of being unemployed. Most of the readers can probably relate. You feel bad about yourself. Even though many, many people are in the same boat. You begin to feel your self worth diminish. I stay busy volunteering, exercising, communicating with other laid-off friends. I've noticed in my small sample of the population none of us are having success at dating much less job searching.

I find this a very intriguing dilemma and conversation to be continued…

First Blog Entry!

So I wanted to get into the whole blogging world. And start my own. But what can I write about, I thought. I was laid off earlier this year. I could write about that. I'm vegan. That's a whole lotta room for writing. Or what about just living in Boston as a transplant. Or wanting to seek like-minded entrepreneurs. Or environmentalists. Or… and I thought about what I seem to be thinking about the most lately. And it's, well, d-a-t-i-n-g.

Dating seems to cut across all of the above topics that I could focus to write about. And so, here goes…

Dating. Dating in general. Dating in Boston. Deep breath. Good 'ole dating. Why does it consume so much of my brain? Why do I even have the urge to date? Is it my age—late 20s or that all of my friends (the best ones that is) are married or engaged. Is it nature?

I'm tired of thinking about it. Tired of doing it. And then I get into it. I like it. It can be fun and exhilarating. And then tumultuous. And what makes dating go to such extremes?

I've had good dates, which by all accounts would fall under the exhilarating category. And bad dates, which states the obvious. And then somehow those seemingly "good" dates soon turn to tumultuous. Maybe it's by date #2 or #3. Sometimes a month into dating.

I've read many books on what to do and what not to do. A good friend doesn't believe in any sort of rules. I've tested both. Go by the rules. Forget the rules. Do a bit of both.

I would love to be in a relationship but not just any relationship. It has to be with the right person otherwise what's the point? I'm better off single!

I dated a guy for five years, of which at least one year was one year too long. It seems the guys I dig don't quite dig me back. And the guys who dig me I can't get rid of quick enough.

Anyone out there feel free to reply to the blog and share your stories about dating. Anything in general or a specific topic to start discussing.